Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Public transportation in Lima

If you have a headache or even the beginning of one, don't board.  If you have personal space issues, don't board.  If you are a clean freak, don't board.  If you are impatient, don't board.  If you don't like to sweat, don't board.  If odd and varied smells bother you, don't board.

In Havana, Cuba, the ongoing joke about the public buses was that they were rated R for sex, violence and language.  The buses in Lima aren't quite that bad I don't think, but then, I've only ridden during the day.

On any given bus ride, you can buy anything from white-out to homemade cookies to ice cream to pens to cd's to parasite medicine, from the folks who use the bus as their sales floor.  You can enjoy live music from the young man who spends his day getting on and off buses and playing his zampona, then passing a bag, hoping for tips.  You can hear a version of the Gospel preached by the bus evangelist.  You can see someone get robbed.

You WILL get bumped, jarred, run into, be rubbed against, be leg to leg with the stranger next to you and you WILL smell a variety of body odors.  Your knees WILL be jammed up against the seat in front of you and you WILL lose your balance at least once, trying to stand or walk while the driver slams on breaks or jerks into traffic.

If you don't have a vice grip on the small child in your lap, he will, at least once, hit his head against the seat in front of you.

You may see a police pull the bus over and be bribed by the driver.  You may see the bus driver yell and gesture at other drivers.  You may see men taking advantage of the forced closeness of a female.  You may have someone's armpits in your face.  You may get nauseated.

My kids say it's fun.  That's probably the last word I would use to describe it.  Useful.  Cheap.  Convenient.  But fun?  The times we have to take a bus are the times I am most thankful for our awesome car.  Ride, anyone?

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